Writing a statement of intent for your IPC

This post comes on the heels of yesterday's post "My IPC Journal - Statement of Intent for a new IPC." This had me thinking about writing actual statements of intent. Why would I want to write one? And if I figured that out, what would go into it?

Why write a statement of intent
One of the best ways to quiz your way through some problems is to write it down. An IPC statement of intent is just that - your attempt to logically look at your idea. If you can articulate it, you can act on it. Also, if what you've written makes sense, you can move on to other steps, like defining your membership and IPC strategy. I suggest writing it down, and leaving it for a couple days. Then pick it up and re-read it. If still makes sense, go on to the next steps. But, if there are gaps in your logic, deconstruct it and rewrite it. Then wait a couple of days, and revisit. If you cannot articulate the idea, then you need to think about viable it is in the first place.

What goes into a statement of intent
A statement of intent is your initial vision and starting ideas for your IPC. It's a working plan or vision that you're starting out with. This will be part of the foundation that you'll use to develop your IPC's strategy. (Refer to "Creating a strategy for your IPC") Here's a list of topic's you'll probably want to cover:

• Overall reason for starting the IPC
• IPC goals
• Anticipated activities
• Activity and organizational road map for the first year
• Description of your ideal member (Refer to "Finding the right members for your IPC")

All this will be subject to change, but the goal is to get this information down where you (and eventually others) can see and edit it.

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My IPC Journal - Statement of Intent for a new IPC

I've decided to do it. Since I've been writing about IPCs for nearly three months, it's high time for me to put words into action. I intend on designing and journaling a new IPC concept that I've had knocking in my brain for a while. My wife and I already have a social IPC that is growing (refer to "Our first Salon" for additional details), but we want to keep most of the details to ourselves since privacy is part of what we offer to the membership. The IPC I have in mind will be more open, and hopefully instructive to you. I'll discuss my approach, as well as any successes or failures I encounter.

As I mentioned in "The Beginning," my experience with group formation includes creating and organizing a local role play gaming group that now has around 1400 members. Also, I'm a huge fan of the writings of HP Lovecraft and related writers. My core concept is to create a local IPC of 'Lovecraftian' gamers and literary fans. There's a lot of possibility with this group, plus a sizable fan base to choose from.

Starting from the beginning, I need to figure out the following issues before my move to the next step of creating my new IPC:

• The basic reasons for creating my IPC in the first place (Refer to "Why create an informal private club?")
• Type of members I want to attract ("Finding the right members for your IPC")
• How I'm going to recruit those members ("Basic ideas for recruiting members to your IPC")
• The IPC's focus ("What should be the focus of my informal private club (or IPC)?")

Next week, I'll explain my rationale relating to each of these initial steps, and report on my progress. Also, I'll provide any amendments and additions to previous posts.

Setting up the programming for your IPC

Once you have your IPC up and running with a handful of events planned and completed, you’ll want to put more meaning or organization behind what the IPC is offering its members. If you’re wanting to be creative, coming up with the club’s event offerings is one of the most creative opportunities you can enjoy. This is also an opportunity to steer the IPC in a meaningful direction. As with any club activity or action, creating the club’s programming should be performed by the club’s steering committee. If the club is large enough to support it, a separate Activity or Programs committee could also be created to handle creating and managing club programming.

If you’re the only one creating the programming, you’ll need to have a calendar on hand. At this point I’ll tell you not to over-commit yourself. If you don’t have assistance, you need to figure out how much you can do and still have a quality product. If you want to expand your offerings, you’ll need to ask for help. As a note, never ‘volun-tell’ people what to do. This is a sure way of turning off your members, and killing your credibility. Instead, tell people about what you’d like to plan and talk it up. Always be open to feedback. Also, empathize that they have a stake in this and you’d like their ideas. With any luck, you may find your IPC’s future steering committee!

Your programming should fit in with your club’s strategy (refer to the “Creating a strategy for your IPC’ post). The events need to be designed to accomplish the club’s overall strategic goals. Creative use of events can be designed to help with this. Also, realize that some events we’ve covered so far in this blog may not be appropriate for your IPC. While a supper club would be great for social or professional IPCs, it’s probably not appropriate for a hobby or certain accountability IPCs. If you’re at a loss, casual meets are always good starting events. Even then, you’ll need to begin formulating events that propel your IPC in the desired direction.

As an example, let’s say you’ve just formed the Midtown Coders Bloc IPC. Your club’s strategy is to network local professional programmers, and to keep folks up-to-date with trends in the industry. You can establish a monthly casual meet to allow your members to just mingle and talk, and speaks to your networking strategy. Also, a member knows someone that is a jobs recruiter, and they’re willing to give a bi-monthly talk about local programming opportunities in exchange for a chance to meet and speak with IPC members. Another member loves hands-on programming, and is more than willing to host a quarterly discussion (we’ll talk about this add-on later) on certain programming topics. Both the recruiter and programming lover speak to the trends portion of your IPC strategy. This serves as your basic IPC programming. From there, the sky is the limit, if you have enough energy and volunteers to go around.

Organizing your IPC Membership

If you’ve recruited several members into your IPC, you might want to start asking for volunteers, or organizing boards, committees and the such to help run the club. I can tell you, without a doubt, this is a hard task. In my experience, most folks want to participate in club functions, and then leave it at that. A small committed handful will volunteer to do more. It’s your task as the IPC organizer to think of ways that members can volunteer in a meaningful way.  It’s up to you to find the committed handful, and expand them into couple hands full.

Before you ask for help, know what you’re asking for first. It’s easy to get caught up in the operations of the club to see what can be done. But if you don’t have an idea of what you want help with, or want folks to do, you’ll confuse and scare away potential volunteers. If you’re running a monthly Salon or Casual Meet that has a good turn-out and very little moderation, those might be events you can turn over to a volunteer. You may even consider designing a volunteer board for sign-ups. This can be managed many ways. One way I’ve seen is to suggest an event and estimate the volunteers needed. Then tentatively post the date for the event with the stipulation that it needs the list volunteer spots to be filled before it becomes a scheduled event.

In running any group, a committee of the right people can go far to help the club grow. Volunteers can do things, but committees provide extra brain power. Please don’t confuse these committees with PTA, civic club, or other organization committees that are droll and boring, because they must operate under tight rules and regulations.  On the other hand, IPC committee is a brain trust that has an overriding interest in keeping the club’s programming fresh and vital. While the committee must conform to club by-laws, these shouldn’t be so constricting as to limit creativity.

 Since your IPC members have been interviewed or recommended, you already have a base of the ‘right’ people. When you have enough people, let’s say ten or more, consider forming a steering committee. This committee can serve as the brains of the IPC. You’ll need to serve as leader for a few meetings, but at some point, you may want to have the committee elect a new head on a yearly basis. This way, the IPC can function independently of one person. Eventually, the committee should be elected by the club’s membership with by-laws in place to guide the election process. I recommend keeping the committee small, no more than seven members for a larger IPC, and no more than 5 for a small (less than ten) to medium (11-50) -sized IPCs.

Don’t be one of those organizers that goes about organizing alone. You’ll burn out very quickly. Also, realize you’ll need to let got and allow the membership to make the IPC a living organization that doesn’t depend on you to keep it moving forward..

Designing Member Guidelines

Last week, I posted “When Should You Consider By-Laws?”, which covered when to begin writing actual rules that your members (and you too!) follow in matters of the IPC. In this post, I’ll introduce the ‘lite’ version of by-laws, 'Guidelines.'

In short, guidelines are suggested standards that you want members to follow in dealing with the club and other members. Unlike by-laws, guidelines are not hard and fast rules, but a guide to follow at the request of the club. Also, unlike by-laws, they’re not enforceable. They can stand alone, or work in tandem with by-laws, becoming in enforceable in the context of the IPC. In those two instances, one is to assist your members when there are no by-laws, and the other are areas where solid by-laws are not needed, but some guidance is needed and can be referred to via the by-laws.

In “When Should You Consider By-Laws?”, I suggest waiting until your IPC is large enough to need by-laws that are written and enforced. This is not to say that you shouldn’t create some basic guidelines to define the expectations of the club and its members. If you have a social club, some common-sense behavior and etiquette guidelines can be established. By the way, for more information on behavior and etiquette, refer to the “A Matter of Manners” post. Guidelines can go above and beyond behavior and etiquette. In “Finding the right members for your IPC,” I introduced the fictional Atlantic Philatelist Club. This club is all about postage stamps, so guidelines would involve meeting attendance, or expectations of presentations or meetings that members host. I haven’t of stamp collectors getting too far out of hand, so behavior and etiquette guidelines would be less than that of a socially-oriented club. These guidelines will help inform the base of any by-laws your club decides on.

Once you have by-laws on paper, you may have some areas that don’t need to be covered by-laws, you may be waiting to see by-laws might be necessary in the future, or there is an area where the situation might be too dynamic to have by-laws. Let’s say that the Atlantic Philatelist Club has established in the by-laws each member must host one meeting a year to remain in good standing with the club. While this is a solid by-law, it might point to guidelines on the minimum standards for a meeting, which don’t need to be covered in the by-laws. With those guidelines, you might also stipulate that the meeting organizer must be in attendance. It’s not a problem now, but if the situation arises consistently, then that stipulation might be promoted to a by-law in the future. In another instance, you may have guidelines that discourage bringing stamp collections to certain meetings, but you also see that this guideline may need to be bypassed for special occasions. 

While I suggested waiting on establishing by-laws, guidelines can be established close to the start of an IPC. However, I also recommend getting member suggestions and feedback, if not shared ownership of the club’s guidelines.

Book review: How to Talk to Anyone; 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships

How to Talk to Anyone; 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships by Leil Lowndes is a solid book in the realm of self-help writing. She comes from the perspective of offering actionable advice. For the most part, she delivers sound advice. If you’ve read other self-help books, some of her advice will be familiar, albeit couched in a way you can use in real life. Also, the book’s tips covers many situations you’ll eventually find yourself dealing with. Information-wise, How to Talk to Anyone is a value, if not an investment.

In an IPC setting, How to Talk to Anyone is handy. It can be used for handling people and building relationships. While some of the tips may not relate directly, there some gems that you can consider using to improve your organizing and hosting game. In aspect, this book is an investment just for its IPC value.

The only real downsides to How to Talk to Anyone is the sheer volume of tips. I listened to this as an audio book, so its use will be limited to me, unless I buy a physical or electronic version where I can use it more effectively as a reference. Bear that in mind before you buy the audio version. The other downside is that some of the information is ages-old self-help advice, so you’re not getting a completely new list of tips. Admittedly, this is me looking for faults in the book, and you can easily gloss over the information you’re already using or doesn’t pertain to your situation.

I recommend this book, particularly if you want to limit your foray into the self-help genre, but have a reference of pertinent information you can use immediately.

Finding the right members for your IPC

© Can Stock Photo / ajt

In “Basic ideas for recruiting members to your IPC,” I mentioned some ideas about finding and recruiting members, but didn’t explore the core of the matter, defining the qualities you’re looking for in potential members.

Open vs Closed Groups

If you're familiar with Meetup.com or some Facebook groups, you'll notice that you can either join immediately, or there is a small screening process before you can join. This is the elementary difference between open and closed groups. Open groups allow anyone to join, and closed groups makes an allowance for an organizer or moderator to ask the potential members questions before allowing them in.  Even with such a basic gateway for membership, you need some basic criteria to make a judgement. In one of the Facebook groups I moderate, we look to see if folks are 'real,' or they’re someone using Facebook to spam messages into our group. We look for things like locality, some posting history, or any other hook that tells us that this person is real. These are simple criteria put in place to mitigate an issue.

An IPC is a closed type of group. It goes much further in screening potential members than what I described above. An argument can be made that the clear majority of Meetup and Facebook groups are open, even if they screen potential members. This is to say the default screening processes are very limited and not thorough. To screen thoroughly, you need a well-developed concept of what you expect out of your membership.

Who is the ideal member for your IPC?

The first task you have in considering your membership is a checklist of broad traits folks need to have to get anything out of your IPC. The most important trait that should be on the top of the list is interest in IPC’s focus! From this point, take care to be reasonable about your expectations. You want to design your checklist in such a way as to identify folks who will be interested in the subject, be active with the group, and will get along with other members.  At the same time, you’re not looking for clones. What are the absolute requirements for joining the IPC? What are desirable traits?

Write a small paragraph about who you’re looking for as far as a member. An example for a Philatelist (stamp collector/historian) IPC might look like this:

“A member of the Atlantic Philatelist Club would be a stamp collector or somebody who has performed some work relating to philately, be it books, magazine or blog articles, or fine photography. Members must be able to attend at least half of the club’s meetings or functions, and be willing to share their knowledge of stamps with other club members.”

Pull out your membership criteria from the description. The starting checklist for a stamp collector’s 

IPC might look like this:

• Has at least one curated collection of stamps, properly stored. (Requirement)
• Can commit to attending six monthly meetings a year. (Requirement)
• Must be 21 years of age or older (Requirement)
• Can host at least one monthly meeting. (Desirable)
• Has a membership to a national philatelist society. (Desirable)
• Is willing to design and teach at least one workshop a year. (Desirable)

You can go deeper, but I would suggest not going more than ten criteria. Even then, if they conform to the required criteria, how many of the desired criteria do they need to hit to be considered for membership?  You should consider the goals of the IPC.

Don't expect perfection

Once you develop your checklist, you need to understand that very few people are going to meet every criterion you’ve established. However, you need to decide how many of the criteria is acceptable for membership, or what combination is acceptable. Of course, the requirements are the definite entry points, but you need to decide how many desirable criteria they need to adhere to be acceptable for membership. Do not expect anyone to be the ‘perfect fit.’ Look at this a goal to aspire to, rather than an absolute.

Live up to your own ideals

In creating membership criterion, you are required to live up to the standards that you’ve established. If you do not live up to the membership criteria you’ve established, both you and the IPC will lose credibility. Although you’re putting in the work – and good work it is – at the core of it, you’re another member. So be realistic with other folks.

When should you consider by-laws?

When you conceptualize your IPC, you’ll also want to think about establishing rules for membership. This means thinking through the kinds of members the IPC will attract, expected behavior, and how the IPC is to be managed. Doing this will give you the basis for creating by-laws. To be clear on what I mean, Merriam-Webster dictionary defines a by-law this way: “a rule adopted by an organization chiefly for the government of its members and the regulation of its affairs.” We’ll use this definition for this article, and any subsequent articles going forward. This post will discuss when you should begin capturing and codifying your by-laws.

© Can Stock Photo / valzan

I’ll start by saying this, let your IPC grow before formulating solid by-laws. You can think about what you’d like to suggest, but creating by-laws should be a group effort. Allow the group to grow, and then see what by-laws are needed. Considerable time can be wasted trying to anticipate how members are going to act, or how well the IPC's activities will conform to its focus. 

Never be a tyrant. Although you’re the one laying the foundations of the IPC, there will be a time where you’ll step down (I’ll also discuss this later), so the by-laws need to a product of the membership, equally binding to everyone. When you have grown enough to establish a steering board or board of directors, is when you need to start creating by-laws. This way, the membership is fairly represented when the by-laws are created, and amended in the future. Even if you and your membership do not form a steering committee or board of directors, you may want to eventually form a temporary committee to write the by-laws, and convene the committee every so often to amend them.

The only exception you may want to consider is when money becomes part of the business of running the group. Even when taking up donations, you may want to establish rules for how the money is to be spent and accounting. I always recommend complete transparency where money is concerned, and your by-laws should reflect this. Also, even if you feel you must establish by-laws for spending and accounting, you can revisit these rules and amend them to expand on other areas of club affairs when your IPC grows enough to support them.

A consideration at this point are Federal, State/Province and local laws regarding clubs, especially when your IPC begins to collect money. There might be laws regarding reporting intake, so it would be a sensible idea to know what those laws are. Even if you’re a small operation now, getting to know the law will benefit you when the IPC grows.

Approach your IPC by-laws thoughtfully, and encourage your membership in helping you formulate them. But first, give your IPC time to grow and develop its needs before you make any rule a firm written commitment.

The Charity and Accountability - more IPC focus areas

© Can Stock Photo / pressmaster

In my post "What should be the focus of my informal private club (or IPC)?," I define four basic focuses of an informal private club; Social, Professional, Field and Hobby. As a result my continuing research, I'll add a couple more focus areas, Charity and Accountability. Unlike the basic four, I would term the follow two a little bit more advanced because of what you need to consider in order to manage them.

Charity
This is an outstanding focus for an IPC, and done correctly, would be very popular. A charity IPC would take aspects of most of the basic IPC types, possibly adding field work or fund raising as activities within the IPC, along with discussions and socials that keep everyone interested and focused on the goals of the IPC's charity work. Charity could also be used as a 'plug-in' activity, like I've written about Salons, but to be truly effective, probably the best expression for charity work in an IPC is a free-standing group. It's probably advisable to associate with a larger association to establish or expand credibility.

If a charity focused IPC is going to do fund raising, it's going to take in money. This means accounting and bookkeeping. If you decide to take in money, everything needs to be absolutely correct, transparent, and in line with county, state/province and Federal laws. Do your homework ahead of time; research as much as possible and ask questions. This advice would be good for any IPC taking in money, either as membership dues or as simple donations. People rightly want to know where their cash is going. Also, it's always a good idea to be absolutely clear about where the money is going and keeping the books open for inspection by the membership. I'll discuss membership dues and money handling in later posts.

Accountability
I encountered the Accountability social organization in the Fast Company Magazine under the article "What You Need To Know To Create An Accountability Group That Works." Basically, an accountability group helps people stay focused on tasks they want to accomplish by reporting their progress to other folks. This is how businesses like Weight Watchers work. With WW, you join follow the plan and do a scheduled weigh-in, report your progress and receive encouragement to keep going. This would be a unique focus for an IPC, which can focus on anything that is task oriented. The Fast Company article threw out health, novel writing, professional uses as examples, but accountability can take many, many forms. Unlike other IPCs, you need to be very aware of the events and activities to present. You'd not want to have dinner parties if the goal of your IPC is help members stay fit and trim, unless the dinner party was about health food, or how to eat better.

An Accountability IPC would have some unique considerations, tact being foremost. Telling someone that they need to do better can be a difficult thing, if you want to empathetic also. You'll need to mentor people about how to be firm, but not rude or overbearing. Consider how the accountability will be handled in the design of your IPC.

Both of these IPCs speak to a higher purpose, and even though they would require some additional work, they could be most worthwhile IPCs you could create.

Creating a strategy for your IPC

© Can Stock Photo / ivelinradkov

It's not enough to simply create an IPC, but what do you want from it? This applies for any type of IPC defined in the 'What should be the focus of my informal private club (or IPC)?' post. For instance, if you've created a professional club, then what is the core mission? Is it to simply be a mixer for like-minded professionals, or is there something deeper to consider? A club should strive to elevate its membership in some way. Networking can be one way, but there's plenty of networking organizations out there. What more can your club do, or advocate? Is there a aspect of ethics you want to accentuate? This could lead to different types of events past socials, such as guest lectures or round tables.

Although I used a professional club as an example, most other club types can also dig deeper, be more focused and exclusive. Hobbyists can focus on a niche such as HO-scale trains rather than model trains in general, Rose gardening rather than flower gardening, and the same for any hobby. Social clubs can focus on food and drink, or an activity such as dancing (which can also port over to a hobby); clubs devoted to a field can narrow themselves down to a specific topic field. Studying the Civil War? You can go as specific as the war in the Appalachians. Studying the civil rights movement? Try looking at the issues per state. There's many ways to split the subject.

If you have a focus, then what is your club's overall strategy? How are you going to elevate your own members' awareness and knowledge, and by what means? What is the club going to offer past gatherings of folks? If you had a schedule, what would you plan to make the club a worthwhile investment of time for the membership and yourself? I suggest start thinking broadly, but narrowing your focus to find a comfortable niche. Also think in terms of 'offering', rather than terms of 'teaching.' What folks want to learn is up to them, and forcing a topic on them will cause some rebellion. Variety within the focus is good. You may look at asking for volunteers, and share the work. Also, I suggest living by the 'Stone soup' story, and have everyone contribute something.

By the end of the year, what opportunities will you have given your membership?

A Matter of Manners

A thought I had recently has stuck with me over the weekend about the core values of manners. It’s been something I’ve thought about the past few years, and I wanted to commit it to a post. It’s about respect and the other auxiliary things that surround it, such as manners, friendship, leadership to name a few. This especially important now, when respect for people seems to have bottomed out. Our discourse with our fellow citizens seems to be rougher than was in the past couple of decades, and we seem to take relationships for granted these days. How can we change this trend? How can we be better? How does this pertain to an IPC?

© Can Stock Photo / innovatedcaptures

Respect

I’ve read many articles about how social media has made things worse in the realm of public discourse. Folks can post anonymously, and be as rude, crass, and frankly loathsome as they want to be and not face the consequences. But is this the fault of social media, or is this a failing of our society, and social media is but the messenger? The one thing that I’ve observed is that the concept of respect for others is not often taught to children these days, and when these kids grow up, it becomes a foreign concept applied for all the wrong reasons. Now that we’ve elected controversial presidents, uncovered salacious Hollywood scandals, and seem to be solidly polarized as a culture in how we think and feel about many social topics, respect sounds like a dead notion. It’s been thrown out on to the rubble heap with once noble ideas of chivalry, patience and charity. I have a naive thought that if people knew the power of respect better, then we would be in better shape in these regards.

So, here we are. What can we do?

One way of looking at respect is seeing or even assuming the positive worth or quality of someone. This should relate along every plane of society, whether it be gender, race, religion, philosophy and politics, or what have you. If you give someone an equal footing in your dealings with them, at least at first, then you’re establishing a rapport that both of you can build on. After that, the relationship becomes a sliding scale of sorts. Depending on either one’s actions, the scale can move further along a positive path, or tumble toward negative territory. Both parties are responsible for how the scale moves. Sincerity and selfless action are two of many ways of moving the scale into positive territory. Having selfish or even abusive agendas are two sure ways of sliding into negative respect territory. Take a lesson from Harvey Weinstein. Selfishness, especially when it’s taken to an abusive level, catches up with you eventually.

When you’re running an IPC, the ability of giving people a measure of respect is a quality you want to encourage in yourself. You’ll meet folks of all sorts, and you want to give them a measure of respect, so they feel empowered to bring their unique perspective to your club. How they act will indicate whether of not they’re worthy. Respect goes both ways. It is a sliding scale.

Politeness

Politeness is often branded as an ‘old-fashioned’ trait, but it has an important function as a societal filter. If you go to YouTube, Facebook or Twitter, you can see the disastrous results when the ‘polite filter’ is turned off. People have the potential to get very nasty in expressing themselves, or in their opinions of others. Sometimes they hide behind a fake name and picture, other times they’re quite open.  I’ve heard both sides espouse doing this as empowering. But is it really empowering? I don’t think so. It’s tit for tat; it’s hiding behind a computer; it’s rudeness at it’s most basic. Is that you? Politeness and respect are tied together. Respect is the concept, politeness is the expression of the concept. Practice politeness. Get a copy of Emily Post’s Etiquette and read it, and then practice what pertains to you. Consider etiquette the functional part of politeness. 

Language

How we express ourselves through language affects our manners. I’m all for free speech, but how you speak reflects the person you really are. Although society seems to accept more alphabet -bombs or -words in everyday language, the fact is that it only reflects how inarticulate and lazy we’ve become. If you really want to make an impact, clean up what you say, and how you say it. Eliminate, or at least minimize, the crass words that have very little significance in daily language. Also, strive to increase your vocabulary. Replace the bad with the good. The more words in your arsenal, the better you can express yourself. This way, you can avoid getting into a donnybrook over how you said something.

Self-reflection

If you’re like me, it’s easy to see a lack of manners in other people, but we don’t see it in ourselves. Therefore, we don’t practice our manners as much as we ought to. Self-reflection is a powerful tool in course-correcting yourself. As a friend said to me about patience, “Every day gives me the chance to practice patience.” The same can be said of manners. But to measure your efforts, you need to think back on what you do. Aim to do little better every day, and think where you need to improve, or think of the areas where you may be backsliding. Keeping a journal is handy to track how well you’re doing.

Being an organizer of an IPC is to aspire for better for yourself and your members. There’s no better place to start than with manners. The world will be that more improved with your efforts.

Apologies for the semi-rant, but I think it's important, especially when you deal with people, I’ll be writing much more on this later.

Managing your informal private club

© Can Stock Photo / webking

With the good times comes the work behind the scenes. Once you've established your IPC, then you need to manage things on the other side. Create a member list, learn to plan ahead, and do the administrative tasks that ensure a smooth-running IPC. If this sounds daunting or busy, it really isn't. If you take steps to automate your tasks, then you can cut your busy time to a negligible level.

Member list
You'll want to maintain a list of your members, with emails and addresses. Even if you invite people through social media, I strongly suggest keeping a list of members with emails and street addresses. This way, you can send physical invites or thank yous using snail mail. Also, if you have a failure with your social media, you have a backup file to use. Additionally, you can track member attendance to events, if that is a concern for your club.

Planning ahead
Planning ahead is a habit you'll want to refine as your IPC grows and you diversify your club's offerings. You should plan your major events in the year, and smaller ones every three to six months. Avoid springing events on your members with less than three weeks notice. Some folks need time to add events to the calendar, and if you consistently create quick-turn around events, you'll risk turning off the members who cannot plan on short notice.

Consider using a free online calendar application like Google calendar. If you do this, I recommend keeping it completely separate from your private calendars.

Administrative tasks
These tasks include maintaining the club's calendar, communication with members, and setting up for events. Other tasks can include member surveys and maintaining the club's social media. Never make the job bigger than it really needs to be. If you can automate tasks, like with an electronic mailing list and templates, do so, but leave the creative aspects of the IPC for yourself.

I'll write about this in-depth at a later date, but what I've listed above are the very basics in administering your IPC.

Dress codes - when and how to apply them to your IPC

© Can Stock Photo / Nejron

Established private clubs are historically known for their strict adherence to dress codes. Even today, most clubs ask for something akin to khakis and polo shirts for men. These codes are meant to help convey a certain dignified and clean-cut atmosphere. The more high-brow the establishment, the more strict guidelines in place. Some of the most established clubs have jacket and tie policies at the very minimum.

What to do for an informal private club? Should you consider a dress code? If so how do you apply it?

An IPC is not an establishment, so dress codes more or less fall on the type of event you're hosting, and the atmosphere to you want to evoke. I advocate developing a base recommended dress guideline, much like an established private club, but make it 'suggested' rather than 'required.' This way, members know they aren't going to kicked out of an event if they don't dress the part, but they also know there is an expectation that they should dress better than t-shirts and flip-flops. Most people usually rise to the occasion. For your events that don't specify dress, the base guideline would cover it just fine.

The base dress guideline should be easy to conform to. An easy way create a base guideline is to create an exclusionary list of clothes that goes against your club's image. Overly casual clothes like t-shirts, baseball hats, and cargo shorts usually find their way on dress code "no-fly" lists for established clubs.  If you plan outdoor activities, then you may want to recommend clothing that is appropriate. For example, if you plan a hike in the summer, you may want to suggest hiking boots or trail shoes along with an athletic t-short and shorts.

Make sure your base clothing guidelines are accessable to all members. Also, if you plan to throw cocktail parties, salons and similar gatherings, you may want to develop a dress guideline for those, too. Like your base clothing guidelines, make sure those are communicated to your club members too. Avoid being overly perscriptive. Part of the fun is allowing people to be creative.

If you have a professional club, a well-defined dress code would be a good idea. Clothing is a form or communication, and in a professional setting, dressing the part is essential. Although a dress code in a social or field -oriented club would optional, I still recommend it, but with plenty of leeway. For a hobby -oriented club, call for dressing guidelines only under special circumstances.

More resources on dress codes:
The Art Institutes, "Defining Dress Codes – What to Wear for Every Occasion"
City Club Los Angeles, "Dress Code"

Effective introductions

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A good introduction is one of the most powerful tools in a conversation. It conveys a wealth of information about someone in a short span. It gives a sort of permission that is sometimes needed to approach someone. It dispels awkwardness, and ultimately, can be the difference between a steadfast member of your IPC, and someone you never see again. Above all, it's the polite thing to do.

Introductions make everyone accessible, especially if there is a preponderance of club regulars in your event or social meeting. Without introductions, new people are left to either sink or swim amid unfamiliar personalities. This is never a good feeling. Extroverted folks can usually make their own introductions and inject themselves into conversations, but even this tends to be awkward and time consuming at first. A well delivered introduction quickly breaks the ice for new people, gives everybody perspective about each other and allows everyone hooks for conversation.

A well delivered introduction

A good introduction should contain these elements:

• Some knowledge of everyone involved. Talk to your club leadership to find out some information about everyone. If you’re a club leader, you should have some working knowledge of folks in your IPC.
• Eye contact, and open and relaxed body language. Eye contact is essential to communication, and welcoming body language puts everyone at ease.
• Names of all involved. Use names that preferred over proper names. For example, if Thomas prefers 'Tom,' then use Tom.  Also, know everyone’s preferred pronouns, if there are non-binary gender folks in the social. I’ll talk more about this later.
• Personal conversation hooks that everyone can relate to. If you cannot find relatable hooks, then throw out some interesting tidbits about the people you’re introducing, but never get too personal. Some good hooks might involve professional or hobby interests, or home state, region or country. Actively avoid using politics, religion, age and health as hooks.

If you’re introducing new folks, be sure to also make a good impression as a host. Lapses in manners on your part can unintentionally stick to the people whom you’re introducing. Be polite, and if you’re introducing new people to regulars having a conversation, make sure to time your entrance at an unobtrusive moment. If the occasion warrants, introduce by professional rank. For example, if someone in the conversation circle is a company president, or firm principal, then they should be introduced first, and then in order if possible.

If you have  members that identify as gender neutral or non-binary, then ask for their preferred pronoun and use it in your introduction as a way of communicating this preference to other club members. For example, John Doe is non-binary and prefers that folks use them, they, their as pronouns. As a host, you can introduce John in this way, “I would like to introduce John. They're very excited to meet you…” If John is with someone who identifies as a binary gender, then you can say “I would like to introduce John and their partner, Jane.”

A well delivered introduction should result in allowing unfamiliar people to be more approachable and ready to converse at your social event. After the introduction is made, it’s up to the new folks to stand on their own feet, conversationally.

Resources for making introductions

Personality Tutor.com, “How To Introduce People”  

Verywell, “How to Introduce People”  

CIO, “Social Networking Etiquette: How to Introduce Yourselfand Others Politely” 

Storyline, “A Better Way to Introduce Your Friends at Parties” 

Basic ideas for recruiting members to your IPC

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People are the most important component of any group, but being able to choose the people who are the right fit for your IPC is paramount to its health and vitality. People who are interested in your club, who are interesting, and who are willing to regularly attend functions are the ones you should search for. Be careful, though. There is another part to consider, and that is chemistry.  Chemistry is hard to define, and it comes from the gut.

The next logical question is, ‘how do I find these people?’ Chances are that you have friends you want to include. This can either be a great start to your IPC, or an unforeseen trap. Even friends need to be subject to the search conditions listed above. You need to be very honest with yourself and ask if the friend is going to be compatible with other folks you’d like to attract. Some people make great friends, but do not have the social graces to play well with others. Or they may have beliefs that they enjoy discussing regardless of the prevailing topic, but those beliefs are incompatible with what you’re trying to achieve in the club. Better to keep them friends on an individual level, rather than later forcing yourself to sacrifice the friends you made in the club for the old friend who has become problematic.

I would avoid creating public access groups in social media to use as recruiting tools for your IPC, but rather, join a few as a regular member.  You’ll find people by being active in the communities that you want to draw from. If you’re someone who wants to attract geeks and nerds, then become active in some local public groups that are targeted at geeks and nerds, and strike up friendships. You’ll be doing the footwork that needs to happen before actual recruiting.

Once you attract some friends, invite them to a coffee or to lunch. In doing this, you want to see how they act on an individual basis, and to see how engaging they can be face-to-face. This may sound manipulative, but you’re expanding your friend circle. If you make friends, be a good friend, and don’t drop the friendship because they don’t suit your IPC. Making and maintaining friends is good trait to develop for someone that wants to manage an IPC. After you meet a few times, start asking them questions that relate to your IPC. In an off-hand fashion, you’re interviewing them for possible membership. With any luck, you’ll hook a member or two.

Once some membership has been established in your IPC, see if they’d be willing to sponsor friends for the IPC. Make sure any potential sponsorships fall along the lines of ‘interest, interesting and regular.’ I’ll talk more about membership intake and maintenance in a future post.

All this recruiting will take time and patience. An IPC is a long-term investment, not a race to collect as many people as possible. You’re looking for a slow build-up that enriches the club, and there will be a limit to membership. Be exclusive will allow you to raise the standards for your IPC.

What should be the focus of my informal private club (or IPC)?

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Before you begin recruiting for your IPC, you need to have some idea of what you want the club to be about. It doesn’t have to be a narrow focus, but you need to be able to state the purpose, no matter how broad. If you’re looking at doing cocktail parties, dinners, dances and similar gatherings, then you’re looking at a social club. If you’re wanting to rub elbows with fellow engineers, programmers, lawyers, and the such, then consider a professional club. I don’t recommend going too much into detail as far as the focus; you want to leave as much room for growth and discussion as possible. A diversity of personalities and experiences is what you’re looking for, and becoming too specific may result in the club lacking any sense of dynamic.

Here’s a list of areas you can form an IPC around:

• Social: Mentioned this above, but I consider this the easiest IPC to create and manage. You can run a purely social IPC, or you can incorporate social aspects into IPCs with another focus.
• Professional: While we’re talking about things already mentioned above, a professional club is another possibility, and one that can have a profound impact in your career field.
• Field: This speaks more to academic fields and pursuits like literature, history, psychology and the like. This focus would be aimed more at amateur interests, rather than professional.
• Hobby: Much like IPCs for fields, hobby IPCs would speak to the hobby in a broad sense, rather than getting down into the pieces and parts. This kind of detail would be reserved for event topics.

I’ll write more on specific IPCs and what you should consider when creating them, as well as adding to the list above as we develop the IPC concept.

Why create an informal private club?

‘Why create an informal private club?’

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This is a potential question that I’ll be addressing throughout the course of this blog. It’s a simple and reasonable question.  The quick answer could be ‘to meet and socialize with friends and acquaintances’, but I think the real question is a bit deeper, so the real answer should be as deep.

I suggest going to the roots of British and American men’s clubs, putting aside the misogyny and racism.  At the core of these organizations was the desire to collect people with similar interests, casual or professional. Clubs helped their members have an excuse to meet like-minded people, become acquainted, and develop personal networks that would last years, or a lifetime.

A natural byproduct of friendships through the club is support for members. If someone is having tough time in life, it’s nice to know that folks from the club will help support when it’s needed. Also, clubs tend gather people with similar interests have similar, or even familiar, tastes. This is great if folks want to be exposed to new things, but do not have someone to guide them through the experience A club can do this on a larger scale, allowing a wider literacy on subjects within the broad interest of the club.

Clubs of the past also strove to educate their members by hosting seminars and lectures, as well as celebrate their accomplishments.  Doing this created deep bonds within the club membership. There is no reason that the same cannot be done on a smaller scale. Clubs give people a reason to spread a wealth of knowledge among people who had an intense interest in the subject matter.

A function of some established private clubs is public service.  Some clubs encourage members to give time and resources to favorite charities. Informal private clubs can choose to do this, too. From what I’ve heard from people I know in organizations like the Jaycees, the public service activity is almost addicting. Much like the reason with common interests, it’s nice to do something as a group effort among friends.

A smaller benefit of private informal clubs is the chance to practice finer social skills, including an excuse to dress well. This comes in handy in many areas of life, namely with family, love and career. The more practice one has at social skills, the easier they’re applied to other areas of life.

I’m sure I hit some of the more obvious reasons to consider creating an informal private club, but as we go along, I’ll think of and write about others.

Defining the 'informal private club' for the Informal Private Club Journal

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A social club can have a definition as wide as all the oceans; stretching from any organized gathering of people to something specific, like the British Gentleman's clubs or college sororities and fraternities. This blog will be more specific, introducing (more likely re-introducing) the concept of an 'informal private club' to the social club vernacular. We'll gather inspiration from the old British private clubs, and their newer reincarnation in the United States, and make it accessible to everyone interested.

What is an informal private club?

An informal private club is a loosely organized group of people with similar interests, or can fit under a broad social or professional umbrella. The membership is curated, much like an established private club, and can include sponsorship and applications, if the club's leadership deems it necessary.

Also, the informal private club is just that, informal. There isn't a club residence or anything permanent. Instead, members take turns at hosting and planning events. The usual place where members meet would be at would in private residences. In essence, members' dining and living rooms become club spaces.

Events should fall within the club member's interests and tastes, but also maintain a minimum level of decorum, much like a formal private club. For example, if the club opts for a cocktail party, then proper attire should be requested. A club shouldn't only be about people gathering, it should also give folks an opportunity to practice finer social skills.

At the same time, an informal private club should be creative, and take advantage of its mobility. Events can take place there is an establishment willing to take a number of people. Events should be culturally uplifting, with plenty of opportunity for the club's members to interact with each other. Where's the fun if the club doesn't have a chance to be social?

The idea of the informal private club will be continually developed in this blog, with all hits and misses discussed.